You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
