I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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