I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Hippo gnu deer
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
