dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You pole danced in your parka.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
