marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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