Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up