He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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