Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
we're making bets on your personal life
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Dick very happy bro
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
