What did we do last night that was yellow?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
