He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
