3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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