Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
