absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
