woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
