My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize