Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
