ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
