Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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