your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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