the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
My vagina is very pro this idea
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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