if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
just tell him i said nine months
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
