Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
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