And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
