idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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