You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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