So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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