There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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