Plan B is the new Plan A
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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