I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
