One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
