Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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