been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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