Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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