i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
