Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize