I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
So much rum. So many feels.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Randomize
