This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
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