Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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