I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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