How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize