I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
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My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
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Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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