Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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