I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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