I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
