I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
