Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
