so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
