This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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