Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
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