her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
