You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
